Saturday, January 31, 2009

10 Years Part 1

Although tomorrow is the 10 year anniversary of my Mom's death I'm going to reminisce today cuz tomorrow is all about my little man Blade and celebrating his 7 years of life. I love how God worked that out for us, it's full circle.

Don't worry although it's a sad day this will not be a tearjerker post. My Mom always told me her favorite thing about me was my ability to find the humor in every situation and make her laugh even when she wanted to cry so that's what I'm gonna do. Since my Mom has been gone 10 years I've thought of 10 funny memories with Mom to share. It's gonna be a long one so this is Part 1, the rest will be posted on Monday.

1) When my Mom would take us to the store and we (and by we, I mean mostly me, my sisters were good kids) would do everything possible to embarrass and humiliate my mom. Such as throwing Bounce on the floor and exclaiming loudly "IT'S FALSE ADVERTISING, IT DOESN'T REALLY BOUNCE!!" or sneaking condoms and booze in her unsuspecting cart without her realizing it. Then as she was checking out she'd get so embarrassed and mad her face would turn 14 shades of reds and she'd make us take them back and put them where we found them. Those were not appropriate items for a pastor's wife's shopping cart.

2) The time my Dad, ever in denial that he actually ended up in a houseful of girls instead of boys, took us on a wilderness vacation to a lake cabin in Minnesota. We rented a pontoon boat for the day. It was Dad and 5 girls (we had another teenage girl living with us too). Three of us girls were on the front of the pontoon, Dad and Mom were driving the boat. Until Mom decided she wanted a picture of us girls on the front of the boat so she told my sister to go up by the rest of us and she stepped up to take the picture. Then because all of the weight except for Dad's was in the front of the boat it began to sink and sink quickly. But Mom still got the picture and the picture shows us with a look of panic as water was coming up on the pontoon around us. Classic. Poor Dad, we were laughing too hard to be of much help as he feverishly bailed water to avoid the rented boat sinking in the middle of the lake and us having to swim to shore.

3) The day that she fell in love with GI Joe. GI Joe and I had been dating for about 6 months and had started talking marriage when we were having dinner with my family and discussing my latest blonde moment/adventure. She looked at him and with all sincerity said "Why do you want to marry my daughter?" And GI Joe, being the quick thinker that he is, replied immediately with "Because I know my life will never be boring." She laughed and told him that was the best answer he could've given and from that day on she was his biggest fan. She liked him a lot up until the point but that day is when as she says "she fell in love with him." As a sidenote, I've done my best to keep up my end of the deal and make sure GI Joe's life is in fact never boring. I think I'm succeeding.

4) My wedding. Think Bridezilla + Momzilla, we were a force to be reckoned with. It was fabulous. But because we were classy control freaks, it went off with only minor incidents and no one disowned us or put out a hit on us even though I'm sure it was tempting at times.

5) My honeymoon. Now one might ask why I have memories of my Mom on my honeymoon but let me explain. The day after our wedding we set out on a road trip to a beachfront condo in sunny Florida. As we pulled out of the driveway of my parent's house I started sobbing hysterically, realizing that I would never again live with my Mom and family. Poor GI Joe, he didn't know what to do, he offered to take me back but I told him that we were married now and we had to do the grown up thing which was keep driving and then I told him not to mind the hysterical sobbing coming from the passenger seat. He did his best to try and comfort me but I just had to cry it out. We did keep driving until somewhere in Georgia, downtown Atlanta, to be exact, when I was hit with the immediate urge to vomit and made him pull over on the side of the road in the middle of the night so I could do just that. It was a bad case of food poisoning. So here I was the blushing bride vomiting on the side of the road in front of my new husband. He found the next hotel, which looking back now was probably in the worst possible part of town but he was a strong soldier just out of boot camp, he could protect us. I couldn't move without wanting to toss my cookies and he kept asking me what I needed him to do. I told him to call my Mom cuz she would know what to do to make me feel better. So he did just that at approximately 4:oo in the morning. She told him to go buy me a Coke and to hold my hair while I was puking. Good advice Mom! After a couple bottles of Coke and a few hours sleep I was a little better and we were able to continue on our journey. Thank goodness for Mom! Secretly, I think she was thrilled to get that call and know that even though her little girl had gone off and gotten married I still needed her. Again, my hat goes off to GI Joe for not leaving me there and rushing back home to seek an immediate anullment.

To Be Continued........


  1. Awe....I LOVED your mom!! And I still every once in awhile....will still put stuff in Nora's cart at the store!! But your moms reactions to it...CLASSIC!!!