Thursday, January 22, 2009

No, Thank YOU!!!

Just when I was beginning to feel uninspired and unsure of what to write about,

showed up on GI Joe's truck after coming out of Buffalo Wild Wings restaurant on Tuesday night. It seems that the alleged "victim" thinks GI Joe parked too close to her. GI Joe says that he parked between the lines and had plenty of space to open both the front and back doors of his truck. Knowing GI Joe and his insane love for his truck it's hard for me to believe that he would put it in harms way of a door ding by parking too close.
So I've used my crime scene investigative skills earned from hours of watching CSI and made the following conclusions:
1) The perp was obviously not a very intelligent individual. GI Joe's truck screams Alpha Male. From the pristine exterior to the personalized Hawkeye plates there's no mistaking it for a chic mobile. Awfully brave there sista.
2) Oh yeah I said sista. It was definitely a girl. I think the use of sarcasm (note the arrow pointing to the Thank You) as well as the use of a triangle exclaimation point is all the proof we need. That and the trying way too hard to sound tough, dead giveaway.
3) Nice stationery. This leads me to believe that it was not a premeditated crime and she went into the restaurant, tried to page the Jerk who parked to close to her and after he didn't come forward, she asked for a piece of paper from the wait staff to write her love note. Either that or she was a waitress. We'll know more when the fingerprints come back from the Lab. But now with Grissom gone, could be awhile.
3) Phew...I'm so glad she clarified that she's a Christian. I mean, that's pretty much how we start every Sunday service but you just never know what kids are saying these days. :) And what a relief that she is a Christian so she didn't have to meet GI Joe and give him the smackdown. GI Joe was visibly shaken by the thought of that.
4) Lastly, we've deduced that our suspect is of extremely stout nature. According to GI Joe, if she had trouble getting between her car and his, then she was one Big Mama cuz there was plenty of space for the person of large to average size.
In closing I have a few words for Big Mama
Big Mama-
Thank you for sharing your Christian testimony with GI Joe. He found it very uplifting and heartwarming. And on that note, we'd like to invite you to church Sunday morning. Call me! Just a word of caution, next time you leave a "love note" on someone's car maybe you should look for an import or a small girly looking car. Chances for your survival are significantly increased that way. Lucky for you, instead of hunting you down GI Joe just brought it home and we enjoyed much laughter and speculation over it. And most importantly, maybe 40 cent wing night is not what you should be doing on Tuesdays. I'm just keepin it real, please don't threaten to "meet" me. No, REALLY Thank YOU!

Prairie Princess

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