It Started Way Back In 1st Grade...

I'm not sure I was cut out to be the mother of boys. Especially adorable, charming boys whom the girls seem to find irresistible.
When I picked Blade up from soccer practice tonight this little girl was following me around, making small talk and being extra helpful while I was trying to locate Blade's water bottle. It wasn't long before she moved in for the kill. I heard her whisper to her friend, "Should I tell her my secret?" Lucky for me her friend gave her the go ahead.
The following is the conversation between Trina* and myself.
Trina: I'm going to tell you a secret.
Me: OK.
Trina: I am IN LOVE with Blade.
Me; Oh really?
Trina: Yes I've loved him since preschool when I tried to kiss him.
Me; OH REALLY?!? And what does Blade think about this?
Trina: Well I had to chase him down to kiss him. But do you know that there are like 20 girls in our class and ALL of them are in love with Blade? (She's seriously swooning at this point.)
Me: Well, he is pretty awesome.
Trina: Yes he is and I love him. (I'm not kidding she is practically drooling at this point.)
Blade starts walking toward us with a look of dread like, "oh no what did that crazy girl just say to my mother who will probably blog about it to the whole world?" Trina giggles and runs off with her friend.

Here's the conversation that Blade and I had in the car on the way home.
Me: So you wouldn't believe what Trina was saying to me.
Blade: (huge sigh, slight growl) What?
Me; Oh you know, just that she loves you, has loved you since preschool when she tried to kiss you, and that all 20 girls in your class love you.
Blade: (eye roll, another sigh) I know. And she's lying about kissing me. But she must've been the one who left that stupid note on my desk today.
Me: What note?
Blade: A stupid note that said "I love you Blade" on it and had a heart on it.
Me: OH REALLY?!? So how do you feel about this Trina girl?
Blade: I don't like her, she's crazy.
Me: Why don't you like her?
Blade: Cuz she's the one who comes to school with messed up hair and I don't like her glasses and her cheeks are chubby like this (he demonstrates for me).
Me: Blade! That's not nice. I hope you don't say that to her. Someday she'll probably be a supermodel or something.
Blade: I doubt it. And I still won't like her.

I'm documenting this conversation here so that when he's a senior in high school and trying to get an extension on his curfew for his date with TRINA, I'll whip this out and remind him how he said he'd never like Trina. Between you and me, if he ever brings Trina home as a date I'll probably have to scare her off with my air pistol. She's a little too agressive for my liking and I don't really like her mom all that much either. And really that's all that matters right...whether or not I like her mom?

This is 1st grade people, we're in big trouble.

*Names have been changed to protect the not so innocent.