It kind of messed with my routine a bit Friday morning when instead of being alone with my thoughts and my morning radio show DJ's (meaning I'm usually still trying to wake up) during my morning commute, I was prepping my children for the proper way to behave for the event. This was my career on the line, I had a reputation to uphold. Oh please, really I just didn't want them to embarrass me. :)
We arrived at work before the event started, because I had some things to do in my office. The kids got their badges (which they did not drop in the toilet like their mother) and thought they were pretty hot stuff. We went to my office where they proceeded to eat everything they could find in and around my desk, Blade attempted to take down my NKOTB pictures, and Ryder was throwing a souvenir baseball around. I had high blood pressure and it wasn't even 8 A.M. After I did what I needed to do and hung my NKOTB pictures back up, I decided a bathroom break was in order. We ran into a friend of mine in the hallway who had just hit the vending machines for his breakfast and Blade tried to steal his donuts. Sigh.... so much for behaving like perfect angels.
There were 18 kids there between the ages of 5-11 so you can imagine the chaos that ensued. Here are a few highlights from the event:
*There was one very young Democratic supporter who kept making references to Obama and how Obama rocks. I stood in the corner cringing just waiting for one of my children to launch into a full on political debate with them. Luckily, they were too busy throwing paper and spinning in the big fancy chairs to hear him.
*Each kid filled out a realistic job application and had an interview. I swear the people who interviewed my children haven't looked at me the same since. I have no idea what the kids said in their interviews but frankly, it scares me. The guy that interviewed Blade did tell me that Blade invited him to go on vacation with us because we were going to mine for gold so that we could turn it into cash for gold. Seriously....
*Speaking of cash for gold, while sitting in the big conference room with the other 18 kids, we asked the kids what they would do with time off. Blade piped up with, "I would steal all of my mom's jewelry and turn it into cash for gold." Ummm that's it, no more tv for him. I realize MC Hammer was rather memorable in the Cash for Gold Superbowl commercial but that was months ago!
*The event reiterated something I've known since I helped with my first school Halloween party.....that teachers are WAY underpaid AND I have no desire to be one. We should pay the pro athletes half of what they currently make and give the rest to the teachers as I think teachers take more of a beating every day then football players take in a entire season. Those of us who helped with the thing were EXHAUSTED and napping under our desks in the afternoon. I'm just saying, next time you go to your child's conferences give the teacher a hug, slip them a $20, a mojito, SOMETHING. They've earned it.
*As we were leaving work and gearing up to go back to school, the kids had their hands full of balloons, pinwheels, a mock credit card, mock checks, a craft, and even their "paycheck", Dakota looked at me and said, "We look like we were just at a party! No one will believe we actually worked." Sadly enough, we get that alot.
*Having said that, Dakota with all sincerity said, "I think I might want to work here while I'm going to college, it doesn't seem that hard." Nice.
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