A Shoe Story

A True Shoe Story by Prairie Princesss

Last week I scored some super cute cowgirl boots, you know cuz I'm a wannabe cowgirl and all, on major sale.  Friday morning I went to wear them and was baffled as to why they looked and felt funny.  After rubbing the sleep out of my eyes and getting another cup of coffee, I determined that I had two right feet.  I'm pretty much a rocket scientist, I know.  And then I cried, because they were THAT cute and I had the perfect new shirt to wear them with and I'd been waiting all week to wear my cowgirlish ensemble.

I took them back to the store Friday after work hoping that either the person who took home 2 left feet had returned them OR that there was another pair in my size.  It was tax free day in Iowa AND the shoe department of the store had some wonderful yellow dot (additional 70% off lowest ticketed price) sales going on.  Sidenote:  I adore the yellow dot sales.  Everything I buy there is always yellow dot.  Anyway, it was a complete madhouse in the shoe department.  I waited patiently in line as the frazzled lady at the shoe department counter helped those in line in front of me.  At one point, she yelled out to another sales associate asking for some backup to which the other associate said, "I can't, I'm helping a customer," to which the frazzled associated snapped back, "WELL I'M HELPING THREE!"  Booyah except not really because the other sales associate still didn't come help her out.  Finally, it was my turn at the counter w/ Frazzled.  I sat the box w/ my cowgirl boots down and explained the situation.  She took them out and confirmed that they were both right boots.  Enter Prairie Princess' mind voice: Umm duh do you think I'd be here asking for a left boot if I had a right and a left?  She told me I should go check the clearance tables and racks and see if there were anymore.  PP's mind voice: "Wow, I would've never thought of that."  I left my boots with her and went off on my wild left boot search.  I went back to the counter 10 minutes later and informed her that I could not find it.  And then I kid you not she said, "Well, I think I figured out what happened."  PP's mind voice:  Oh really, please enlighten me, because it is a huge mystery.  She continued, "I think what happened is someone bought a pair and ended up with 2 left boots."  PP's mind voice:  NO WAY!  I never would've guessed.  She then demonstrated for me how boots may have been flailed around while people were rummaging thru the sale table and may have ended up in the wrong box.  PP's mind voice:   I am so glad she's reenacting this for me because I would've lived the rest of my life wondering.  Once she finished demonstrating, she said, "The only way to prevent such things from happening is to always check to make sure you have a LEFT and RIGHT."  PP's mind voice:  Of course!  Why didn't I think of that?  Oh wait, isn't that YOUR job?  She continued with her lecture on the importance of checking both shoes before you buy and then finally said, "No one has brought back 2 left boots and they probably never will so I think you're just going to have to return them, unless you want 2 right boots."  PP's mind voice:  So what she's telling me here is that I'm an idiot for not making sure I had one of each but also that there is a person walking around central Iowa with 2 actual LEFT feet.  Amazing.  Now apparently I need to give some deep consideration to whether I'm going to return them or get some foot plastic surgery so that I can have 2 right feet to accommodate these boots?  Wouldn't 2 LEFTIES and I be quite the pair?!?  

In the end, I figured that foot plastic surgery was too costly since it was just ONE pair of shoes.  Now if I had a whole closet full of right footed pairs, I'd be all over that.  
I was heartbroken to part with the cute boots.  But it was nothing 2 pairs of shoes on yellow dot clearance couldn't heal.  And don't worry, I learned my lesson and this time before I bought them I CHECKED to make sure I had a right and a left.    If you only ever learn one thing from this blog I hope it's this, "When buying shoes, do this or you're sanity you'll lose.  Left, Right, make sure they're both in sight."

The End.