Sunday, August 9, 2009

Baseball, Black Eye, & the Bathroom

This weekend I rediscovered my disinterest in baseball. I scored free tickets to the Iowa Cubs game on Friday night so GI Joe and I coerced our friends, Jerry, Annette, Doug, and McDreamy to go with us. I strictly go to baseball games for the hot dogs and I got my hot dog, Chicago style, and it was magnificent. Wish I could say the same for the game. It was dreadfully boring and the fact that the stadium was really full and we actually had to sit in our crowded row of seats which inhibited our normal tomfoolery, picture taking, and conversation didn't help matters. I would've thought with our celebrity status and such that we would've had a press box or something. But NOOOO, we had to sit in box seats with everyone else. It totally cramped our style. (Sidenote: apparently being a blogger with 5 followers doesn't make one a celebrity, I thought that's how I got the tickets?!? Whatever.) We bailed after the 7th inning. Of course, as in everything there were a few highlights. They were as follows:

*My wonderful Chicago style hot dog. Oh did I mention that already? It was THAT good.

*When I told everyone that maybe we could go out on the field and take some pictures during halftime. Apparently, baseball doesn't have halftime. Whatever. They need to, a little half time show would've done the game good, maybe add some excitement..heaven forbid.

*When we yelled "fore!" for a foul ball headed our way and "Touchdown!" for a hit and the looks we received from doing so. C'mon someone had to liven up that joint. The soundbooth sure wasn't doing it with their elevator music. Ever heard of Jock Jams people? Let me burn you a copy.

*When Jerry gave me a black eye because I remained sitting when a foul ball came our way and he got a little excited and started throwing elbows everywhere, namely towards my eye. He nearly broke my sunglasses and we all know how low on sunglasses I'm running these days. (http://hillbillyhilarity.blogspot.com/2009/08/at-drive-thru.html) From then on, everytime there was a foul ball I got in tornado position, arms protecting my head. By the way, he didn't get the ball but he did give me a concussion. Thanks Jer.

*When our friend Jeremy (http://hillbillyhilarity.blogspot.com/2009/01/blast-from-past.html) snuck away from his wife (Hi Signe!) and friends to come chat with us for an inning or so. I did introductions that went a little something like, "This is Annette, you probably know her from the blog." and "This is Jeremy, our high school friend, he and his wife were featured in the blog once." Thanks blog for making introductions easy.

*When Annette and I got excited because the announcers kept talking about "Gucci". Unfortunately, they weren't shooting Gucci product out of the hot dog gun but instead were talking about some I Cubs player named Taguchi. Why must they tease us like that?

*When I was scoping out women for McDreamy in the ladies bathroom. Do you see a problem with that? I don't. I was in the bathroom before the game and this cute girl (within the appropriate age range for McDreamy) in a Hawkeye hat (as an alumni he LOVES his Hawkeyes) was washing her hands (good personal hygiene...yes!) and was NOT wearing a wedding ring (great! she's available). But here was my dilemma. How do I approach a girl in the bathroom alone for my single male friends without a) looking like a freak b) looking like a freak? Hmmm. Haven't figured this one out. Suggestions welcome. Maybe Annette & I could hang out in the bathroom and hand out paper towels and lotion like they do in fancy restaurants and hotels, and as they reached for a paper towel, we'd check their left hand for a ring, and if it was bare we'd hand them a paper towel with Doug & McDreamy's picture on it and a questionnaire on it. If interested they'll be instructed to call us. And by us, I mean Annette and I. You didn't think we'd really let our friends go out with just anybody did you? We'd have to screen them first obviously. Hard to believe their both single with friends like us. Weird huh? To the Hawkeye Hat Girl from the Bathroom-If you're reading this, and I'm sure you are, call me. I have someone I want you to meet. Judging by the way you washed your hands and looked at yourself in the mirror, I think the two of you would really hit it off. He washes his hands too! What are the odds?!? It's a match made in heaven.(McDreamy-Are you happy now that you got some blog exposure? And again my apologies for failing you as wingwoman. That could've been the future Mrs. McDreamy and yet I just let her dry her hands and walk away. I'll do better next time, there are more bathrooms out there.)


Here's a picture from the evening.



I didn't say it was us. But it was taken at the I Cubs game and looks like they're having fun so you get the idea. Anyone know these people? I see some potential Doug/McDreamy matches. Call me.

2 comments:

  1. Wow, I feel famous now. Thanks for blog exposure!!

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  2. Oh wow....we did kinda have a good time didn't we? We just have to have places where we can be our crazy selves, just an off night, but it's the company that makes it better. Did Jer really give you a black eye? I feel bad, I think he should buy you a coach purse now!!

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