Monday, March 9, 2009

Muddy Day Makeover

I am not a fan of mud. Not to sound like a stuck up princess but it disgusts me. (I suppose if you've been reading this blog for awhile it's too late for that). Anyway, yes, I realize that mud means that it's raining and/or the snow has melted which means spring is near, grass will be green, blah, blah, blah but I still don't like it. I've had one too many unfortunate incidents caused by mud, one of those was a very traumatic run-in with barbed wire that I'll tell you more about in a separate post. It's just too traumatic to go into right now. The moral of the story is I don't like mud. It ruins my shoes, tracks in on my floors, and makes my animals look dingy and dirty and detracts from their natural beauty.

Exhibit A:

Dirty Ducks (and a Goose)-I think they actually like the mud but I don't like the way it blemishes their pretty white feathers. And Duck Duck Goose, well, he always looks like that. There's no hope for him even on a dry day but we love him anyway. He is after all the only animal at the zoo to have ridden in the passenger seat of GI Joe's truck.

Exhibit B:

Even Chicken Joe looks crazier than usual. I think he needs some anti-frizz cream.

Exhibit C:

Poor poor Pegasus, his usually lustrous and full mane is hanging in wet tangles. It's going to take some DEEP conditioning to fix that. (My apologies for the slightly blurry pictures, it's not easy taking pictures in the rain with 3 leaves of hay in your hand and a turkey pecking at your leg)

And then there's this princess who would positively melt if she had to be out in that muddy mess longer than absolutely necessary. She's quite content staying inside, napping with her feline friend. It's a rough life she leads.

But I do have a couple secret weapons for when it is a mud pit outside and I have to do farm girl stuff. They even cheer me up a lil' bit. Sadly, it's not pink Carhartts. Speaking of which they still have NOT called me back. I'm getting irritated now and may just take my raspberry coveralls over to Dickies. Carhartt, you'll be sorry you didn't jump aboard this ship. I digress, back to my secret weapons.

The gloves are to protect my oh so delicate hands, (oh please I have the hands of a 50 year old mechanic) from vicious barbed wire fences and to avoid getting my hands dirty...ewwww. Besides they are just cute and make me feel like a real farm girl even though we don't actually have a John Deere tractor, or raise crops or anything that would warrant having a John Deere tractor, but still it's just the thought. And the boots, well the boots are just awesome. GI Joe had bought all 5 of us, kids included, a pair of boring black rubber chore boots last spring, when he decided he didn't want the excuse, "I don't have any bad shoes to wear" to hinder us from helping him with chores. Trust me we tried it. But you should know by now that I'm not content with run of the mill OR unisex clothing/shoes. So I made it my mission to find some pink chore boots and mission accomplished. On clearance I might add. They go up to my knees so I do like all country folk do and tuck my jeans or pants into my boots so they don't get dirty and away I go. Looking cool no doubt. The best part about them though is that I can just spray the mud right off.
In closing I would just like to share this little poem I was inspired to write as I was feeding animals,slipping around in mud, and resembling a drowned rat as it continued to rain on me.

Rain Rain go away
Come again some other day
Let's do like Florida and only rain a few minutes a day
I would like it better that way
The mud is yuck
Turns everything into muck
Dear Lord I'm not asking for a drought
Just help a girl out
Thanks, Amen

Original poetry by Prairie Princess

1 comment:

  1. What on earth is that around your dog's neck??!! A green camera collar????