Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Ramblings of a Crazy Person

A couple items of note:

*Dakota, Blade and I went to our first auction of the season. UNSUPERVISED!! WITH THE CHECKBOOK! And all we brought home were these..

A disappointing auction showing. All I wanted was a peahen, a baby goat, a zebra, OH MY. But it was slim pickins at the auction and they just didn’t have the goods. Also my farmer friends and the crazy meth addict who shows up occasionally trying to pawn off her animals in exchange for meth money, weren’t there so it was kind of boring. Maybe next month will be better.

*Speaking of crazy looking birds, we also added this guy and girl to the Flock? Herd? Family? Baby Emus. After losing our emus, Elvis and Priscilla, to mysterious causes over a year ago it was high time we got some more. What’s a wannabe petting zoo without weird, kinda freaky looking, giant birds I ask you?

Enrique (said with a rolling r and a head bob) and Elvira (said like the Oakridge Boys song and ending with a hand clap, obviously.)*After reading and loving the book “The Lucky One” by Nicholas Sparks 2 summers ago, I was thrilled when I heard the movie was coming out. GI Joe’s reaction was slightly different, as he cowered in a corner hoping and praying that I hadn’t seen or heard that it was coming out. I promised him there would be war scenes since the main character was a Marine. I failed to mention that most of the story takes place AFTER he returns home from war but whatevs, minor details. Being the wonderfully devoted, wife pleasing husband that he is, he took me out for sushi and then we went to see this movie. While it was no “Notebook” caliber Nicholas Sparks movie (which btw GI Joe actually loves), I thoroughly enjoyed it and thought it was really sweet. GI Joe thought it was “tolerable” but “there was only 2 minutes of war scenes, you PROMISED it was a WAR movie?!?” Clearly, he misunderstood because what I actually said was “He was a Marine so there should be at least a few war scenes,” or something like that. Hmmpphh..men and their selective hearing. I’ll tell you what I REALLY enjoyed about this movie..

Zac Efron. Don’t worry it’s legal, he’s ALL grown up now. Phew. GI Joe thoroughly enjoyed my commentary on this particular subject throughout the movie when I said things like, “Why would they cast HER as the love interest, she looks 50! They should’ve cast ME!” I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…special place in heaven for GI Joe…right next door to the love shack where Zac Efron and I will live. I’M KIDDING…kinda. ;)

*Pretty sure I’ve mentioned it before here on the blog but please, I beg of you, I NEED you to read this book “The Fault in Our Stars”  immediately. I read it in March and am still thinking about how much I love it. I convinced a couple friends to read it so I could discuss it with others and they too had the same reaction and completely understood why I asked them to quit their lives for a day or two to READ THIS BOOK. It’s just one of those books. I don’t know what else to say about it until you’ve read it. Then after you’ve read it we can talk about that part where you’ll laugh out loud hysterically and then the other parts that will make you weep and how you’ll fall in love with and want to hang out with the main characters. This book ruined me for the next 5 books I’ve tried to read. It’s just that kind of book. Read it, let’s talk about it.  Blog book club, let's do it.

*The other day I mowed the lawn with a Zero Turn Riding Mower for the first time. GI Joe had been super busy (you know, going to see “The Lucky One” again because he loved it so much) and our lawn was starting to look like a jungle. So much so that I was ready to buy a Jeep and charge to take people on a safari through it. “Look that way, see that hornless cow?!?” or “To your right you’ll see a wild, crested chicken, native only to Africa the Koons Zoo.” It would’ve been a smashing success I’m sure. But instead I decided to be nice and mow it myself so GI Joe wouldn’t have to do it. I know, I know, I’m such a giver. So I started on one side of the lawn (it’s divided by a walkway) and after many starts and stops because those zero turn mowers are TRICKY, I finally got the hang of it. I really don’t know what I was thinking (a common theme in my life) but instead of doing straight up and down, I went in a circle around that half of the front yard, so in the end, I was dizzy and there was a giant pile of the cut grass in the middle of the yard. It was classy but it looked slightly better than the jungle we had going on before so I was pleased with myself. I should’ve just moved on to the other side of the yard but nooooooo, I’m an overachiever and thought to myself, “This is easy! This is kinda fun! Look how fast I can go! I’ll just mow the ditch on this side really quick! I’m such a good wife!” Yes, I talk to myself in exclamation points so what? So I started in on the ditch. I think you’re supposed to drive down the length of the ditch and then drive back down it and repeat until the entire ditch was mowed. But this made me nervous because it’s kinda steep and I thought I was going to tip over. So instead I decided to do the down one side up the other formation. That worked for approximately one second. Then this happened…

It was stuck, apparently that was too steep a hill for it to climb. Where’s the 4 wheel drive on this thing? So I text GI Joe a picture and said “What do you do if something like this happens?”

He responded “What are you doing?!? Step away from the mower!”

I called him and told him that I was trying to save him some work (that worked out well) and was mowing the lawn and to please just tell me how to get it unstuck because the pushing, pulling, and prodding I had tried wasn’t working. Shocking that I couldn’t move an 800 pound tractor. He reluctantly told me things I could try to get it unstuck and also that you’re not supposed to do the down one side up the other side because it’s too steep and I could flip the mower over. Huh. They didn’t work and also every time I heard a car coming I jumped off of the mower and went in hid in the trees til they passed because HOW EMBARRASSING TO GET THE MOWER STUCK IN YOUR OWN FRONT DITCH?!? You understand, obviously my reputation deserves protecting. Eventually, I gave up, leaving the mower stuck in the ditch, one half of the yard mowed in a spin art formation and the other half looking like an overgrown prairie. A proud moment for sure. GI Joe got home awhile later, got the mower unstuck and the rest of the yard mowed within 30 minutes. Showoff.

*During church last Sunday, the pastor aka my father in law, was talking about the effects of aging in his sermon. That wasn’t the whole theme of his sermon, (it actually did make sense in context) but he was talking about the things you can do in your youth that are harder as you age and the other joys of aging such as achy joints, ailments, disease, death, etc. Ryder, age 8, leaned over to me and said, “Wow, this is sure inspiring.” Ha! Love it.

Until next time…

No comments:

Post a Comment