My head hurts (could be brandy withdrawals) and I can’t really think nor type in coherent sentences so here are a hodge podge of things that I’m sure you’ve just been dying to know…or not, but you’re here now and just like a wreck you just can’t help but look. So read on friend, read on.
*SOMEHOW, I am in charge of Ryder’s class Halloween party. Clearly, I was under the influence of something (I have my suspicions) when I signed up for that at the open house in August. I just sent out my first email to the other moms who had signed up to help, not CHAIR it, as that was all me (hello Type A). After sending the witty, slightly sarcastic, “let’s do this” type email it occurred to me that not everyone on that email distribution may get or appreciate my humor. I’m quite certain that there will be kids absent from the Halloween party because their parents felt it best to pick up their kids early from school that day rather than expose them to the crazy lady running their Halloween party. I keep forgetting that when reading what I write not everyone hears it the way I do in my head. So weird. On the bright side, Ryder tells me that this party is the most anticipated of the year because “Ryder’s mom” is in charge again and remember last year when she let us play with toilet paper and stuff?!? Yeah I know kids, it’s a gift.
*Hypothetically speaking, IF I dropped my ATM card in a clean toilet in the bathroom at work, I would in fact reach in and get it out, gagging the whole time. And then I would, hypothetically, wash it and my hands thoroughly with soap and hot water, and then SLATHER it in hand sanitizer. And then I would wash my hands again 17 more times and still feel slightly nauseous at the thought of using that hand to eat or prepare any type of food so would use my left hand for the rest of the day. Hypothetically, of course. Because if that happened in real life I’d probably throw up a little every time I went to use my card. Wait, how could GI Joe have orchestrated such a thing?
*Has this ever happened to you? Let's say you were shopping in a store and when you go to leave the store you can't find your keys in your purse. So then you dig thru the contents of your purse, get really mad because you still can't find them so you then retrace all of your steps back thru the store which were aplenty because you are a shopper and must check out every single area. You get even madder because you still can't find them and have now just spent 10 minutes retracing your steps. So then you go out to your truck in the hopes that maybe you left them in there as you sometimes accidentally do. On your way out to your truck, you happen to reach into the pocket of your jacket and are holding on to your keys as if they weren't the very item you've just spent half your life looking for and it takes you, honest to goodness, a good 30 seconds before you realize, "Oh hey! There's my keys!!!" Ever happened to you? Yeah me either, just wondering. :)
*The other day I stopped at Costco after work for some necessities (not eggs though..booyah!). The end. Just kidding there's so much more to the story. If you're familiar with Costco you know that they are the sample mecca, every day of the week. Sometimes we'll go there on a Saturday around lunchtime and tell the kids, "If you're still hungry after we shop/eat our way thru Costco" we'll go have lunch." Oft times, no lunch is needed. So I was
*Last weekend it was Hicks+Six at the Koons Zoo. We had SIX kids from Friday night til